Home Again, Home Again, Jig-idy Jig

Well, it's true - Ben has been back home for almost 24 hours. We scooped him up Wednesday and were home in time for his 6pm feeding.

He even passed his carseat and eye tests before leaving the SCN. So, no more silly car bed (well, in the car. He loves to sleep in it during the day) and hopefully no worries about ROP (Retinopathy of Prematurity - a scary eye problem for preemies who got oxygen)

We took him to his pediatrician yesterday and he weighed in at a whooping 5 pounds 9 ounces. A full two pounds heavier than his birth weight.

The first two feedings at home Wednesday weren't great, and I started to worry we'd be back in the same boat. But then had super duper feedings since then. We even did some breast feeding yesterday at noon. He went to town for about 15 minutes and then slept in my arms, up against my chest, for a few hours. It was SO peaceful.

I certainly hope that I'm not jinxing anything by writing about how good he's eating, sleeping, and pooping - but he's been a trooper.

We are very, very blessed.

Sunday at the SCN

One of the benefits of having a small baby, is that you can bathe him in a basin the size of a shoe box.

Yesterday Nurse Marji showed Momma P how to bathe Ben in a "tub", now that his cord has fallen off*.

Marji even made it a little jacuzzi by adding soap and then the oxygen tube, so it all bubbled up.

As you can see, Ben definitely enjoyed the experience. I think he looks very mellow here. I also think (but don't EVER tell him I said this) that he looks a little bit like a wet chicken. But a VERY cute wet chicken.

He's been doing better with the eating thing. He still "desaturates" at least once or twice during a feeding, but it's not half as bad as it was before. He's alert before and after the feedings and smiles more often. He also becomes "Angry Baby" sometimes - screaming and turning bright red.

The goal is for Ben to go 48 hours with "no funny stuff" during the feedings.


* When we brought Ben home from getting his blood tested last Tuesday and were changing him - we noticed that his cord had come off. However, we have yet to find the cord. Hmmm... we're a bit scared where it will show up.

Back to the Special Care Nursery for Ben

Well, the best laid plans... Ben came home on Sunday but last night we brought him back to the SCN so he could have a blood transfusion. We always knew he was anemic, but the hope was that by giving him iron and 40 mls of breast milk during each feeding that his red blood cells would increase.

Since he's so young, he still doesn't have the suck/swallow/breathe thing down pat - so eating was a chore. So much of a chore that he was pooping out before he could get all of the nutrition he needed. So, that "'turning blue" thing he was doing during eating (called Desatting - for Oxygen Desaturation) was getting worse. His low blood count was impacting his ability to stay awake long enough to eat. And when he's tired, the desat thing gets worse and worse.

I can tell you from personal experience, there is nothing more terrifying than seeing your baby turn blue in your arms.

The extra boost of Poppa Nick's blood should help him continue to grow and thrive. And, as he gains his strength back, he will be able to eat better and get the nutrition he needs. Please, please, please send positive thoughts his way.

It's all feeling very, very scary right now.

Above are some pictures from the past few days at home.

Homeward Bound

Today's the day... Baby Ben comes home today. We feel so fortunate that this kid has done so well over the past 3 weeks. We also feel so fortunate that he received such amazing love and attention at the Special Care Nursery.

Ben, as of midnight, was 4 pounds 10 ounces. But then, according to his nurse Maria, he had a huge poopy diaper. So maybe, he's really 4 pounds 8 ounces.

Friday Ben failed his car seat test. This means his oxygen levels went below normal, and after only 3 minutes in the car seat. This caused much stress and panic for Momma P. But, we got a car bed (hospital approved) and so we can now take this kid home. Once he's at least 5 pounds and his neck muscles are stronger, he should pass the test with flying colors.

We also received our training on Ben's take home monitor. The monitor seems very simple to use and is smaller than a VCR. It will be nice to only have 2 tiny wires attached to Ben, instead of 5 he has now.

We spent a great deal of time on Saturday feeding and caring for Ben, trying to make sure we're learning to understand his cues. He's getting better at remembering to breathe during his feedings, but he's still not perfect. I've made a deal with him - that if he remembers to breathe, we'll bring him home today. So far, he's keeping his end of the bargain.

So, friends and family, wish us luck as we become full-fledged parents. We're tried to stock the house with food - it's felt like we're preparing for a blizzard. We might not answer the phones for a few days. But, please, send very good vibes our way.

love,
The Pollara Family
Nick, Susan, and the amazing Baby Ben

Getting Ready for the Big Day!

It looks like Friday or Saturday will be the big day. Ben had his "sleep study" last night and it showed that he's having episodes of apnea (like his Grandpa Stan). So, Ben is now on caffeine to help regulate his breathing. The doctor's believe the apnea is being caused by his anemia. Hopefully both will get better in the next few weeks.

To prepare for going home, Momma P gave Ben a sponge bath today. The first picture is after the bath. You'll notice that Ben discovered his fingers today.


This is Nurse Barbara saying goodbye to Ben. Ben could not have grown as big and strong without the love and care of the nurses like Barbara. They are like Fairy Godmothers...
Here's Ben's room. Or at least part of it. The rocker is ready, the diapers are ready, even the window seat is ready. Now we just need Ben to be ready.

Happy Momma, Happy Baby

After Ben's 12:30 bottle, we snuck in a little Kangaroo-ing.

Only Bottles for Ben

Sunday was a big day - 3 bottles.

Monday was an even bigger day - all bottles, all the time. No more feeding tube!! It's definitely exhausting for such a little guy to drink 6 bottles a day - but Ben is getting the hang of it. At his 12:30 feeding, he did great - slurping down 37 ccs in 15 minutes. His 3:30 feeding was a different story. He was dead asleep when we started and kept falling asleep during the feeding. Nurse Ilene kept showing me tricks to wake him up, like putting a cool, damp cloth on his head; opening up his sleeper; tickling his foot. He would squirm, grimace, and go right back to sleep. That feeding took 35 minutes. The goal is for each feeding to take only 30 minutes. Otherwise, he expends more energy than he gains. When he's that tired, he forgets to breathe. That can be a bit scary.

Nick did the 9:30pm feeding and Ben handled it like a champ. Slurp, slurp - burp - done. It was great. Then, Ben was wide awake, totally content, hanging out with his parents.

And, as of this morning, he gained another ounce - and is up to 4 pounds 2 ounces.

Soooo Big!

Look at me in my spiffy new outfit. Notice that I don't have the feeding tube in. That's because I'm getting so active that I pulled it out. I'm up to 3 bottles a day and as of Saturday night I weighed 4 pounds!












Here's me in another outfit. Another one of my tricks is right after Momma P changes my diaper, I pass an unbelievable amount of gas and then fill the diaper with TONS of poop. Usually it gets all over my outfit - thus the outfit change. I am very proud of my excellent bowels.









Again, notice that I don't have any tubes. The nurses put another one in, but at least for a tiny bit on Sunday, I was tube free.

A Quick Thank You

I just wanted to say "Thank You" for all of the phone calls, emails, and comments on BP's blog. It REALLY helps during this very surreal time in our lives. I'm doing my best to return calls and emails, but it's taking a while. The comments on the blog warm our hearts. It just helps us remember all of the people in the world who are cheering this beautiful kid on.

Thanks!!

Bottle Feeding, Day One

I know all parents think their child is a genius. But, look at our kid go at this bottle...

Nurse Grace was hoping he would take 5ccs of the bottle and he took, ready for this, 22ccs!! He totally got the suck, swallow, breathe routine during yesterday's first try at bottle feeding.

Now I understand that this was just the very first time he used a bottle. Today he could decide that he hates it, or he could forget to breathe, or swallow, or suck. But, he did his parents proud yesterday. Go Ben Go!!

I thought he was cute before, but now look at him

Look at how cute this kid is!! Not that I'm biased or anything...

So the bottom picture is of Ben receiving his 8:30 pm Bolis feeding. The lovely smiling nurse is Tish. She was the nurse on duty the night Ben was born. Last night was a very happy occasion for all of us, because we've seen Ben make so much progress. Notice that Nick is holding a pacifier in Ben's mouth and Tish is holding a tube of breastmilk that's flowing into Ben's tummy. Ben is sucking away on the pacifier. Notice also the hat Ben is wearing. Ilene, the day nurse, calls it his Pope hat.

Happy 2 Weeks Old!

Today our little guy will be 2 weeks old. Or, 33 weeks old - depending on how you calculate it. With premies, it seems that you keep counting their gestational age, as if they were still in-utero, until they reach their due date.

Whatever, we're just thrilled with how he's growing.

You can see how his face is starting to fill out. He now weighs 3 pounds 10 ounces. One ounce more than his birth weight. Today they started something called "Bolis" feeding (pardon the spelling). This means, that while still feeding through a tube, he gets all of the breastmilk for a feeding within 30 minutes. Before they were giving the breastmilk over 2 hours. This Bolis feeding is more like how babies really feed - a few ounces in a concentrated time, every three hours. His little tummy is now getting used to this, so hopefully soon we will begin bottle feeding. Today, during his 2:30 feeding, I held him and gave him a pacifier. He totally sucked the pacifier for most of the feeding. This is a BIG huge step. This means that he's starting to connect sucking with getting a tummy full of milk. After the feeding he totally conked out in my arms. Eating, sucking, and breathing takes ALOT of hard work.

Ben had 2 ultrasounds yesterday. One on his head and one on his kidneys. His head is perfectly normal, which is great. His kidneys are retaining a teeny tiny bit of urine. There's some big fancy name for this. But basically it means that they are giving him a teeny tiny bit of antibiotics everyday as a preventative measure and once we get this guy home, he will see a pediatric urologist for another ultrasound. The doctors don't seem to concerned because his bodily functions are definitely working properly (and often). But, it's something to keep our eyes on.

Anyway, HAPPY 2 WEEKS BEN!!! We are so lucky to have you in our lives!!

Love, Momma P and Poppa P

Residual Effects

The nurses, doctors, and "premie" books keep warning us that there will be setbacks with Ben's progress. "Slow and Steady" they tell us "wins the race". Cousin Michael suggested "Don't get too high or too low, try to keep more even."

Clearly, this has been easy advice when your baby keeps moving forward. Sunday was the first day I felt like we had a setback. When the nurses check Ben's vitals, they all check to see if there is any residual breastmilk left in the bottom of his feeding tube (the part in his little belly). They do this by taking a syringe and extracting anything left in his tube. Up to Sunday, there had never been any residual. Sunday, at the 5pm check, there was quite a bit. It was pretty upsetting. Nurse Barbara tried to convince us that this was just one of those small setbacks, but my heart was just crushed.

When we called back after the 9pm check, we were happy to hear that there wasn't anymore residual. And there hasn't been any since. But, this really threw me for a loop. The residual effect on Momma P is that my worry level has definitely gone up. There have been a few more tears and a lot more reading of premie books.

The great news is that he continues to thrive. He's gained more weight - he's up to 3 pounds 6 ounces. He's getting vitamins along with his breast milk, and they are fortifying the breast milk to give it more calories. Hopefully Thursday they will start trying to bottle feed him (nippling they call it).

Today Baby Ben has a kidney and head ultrasound. Just routine, and clearly painless for Ben. Clearly worrisome for Momma P and Poppa P.

Yesterday, Nurse Margie dressed Ben. He's doing a great job of regulating his body temperature, so instead of warm air blowing around his incubator, he can wear clothes and keep himself warm. Above is a picture of Ben in his stylish outfit.

I Love My Grandma!!

Baby Ben and Grandma Marcia had a lovely visit yesterday.

Ben is up to 10cc's of breastmilk an hour and he no longer has any IVs. Hopefully by next week we can start trying to bottle feed him. He keeps gaining weight (he's back up to 3 pounds 6 ounces after losing some of his birth weight).

We're getting ready at home for Ben's homecoming. Poppa P put the bassinet together and Momma P has been washing everything in Dreft.

We just can't wait!!

He is SO cute - I could eat him up!

Not that we're biased on anything, but our kid is SO cute. Yesterday Ben, once again, surprised us all and kicked his needle habit. That's right - no more IVs for Ben!! Only breast milk through that little tiny tube sticking out of his mouth.

In the last picture (hat free), you'll notice that his little cone head is getting more rounded.

Once we get the Bilirubin test results back today, the doctors will decide if his jaundice is really gone. If it is, the velcro stickers can come off.

This morning is going to be a big day - Grandma Marcia is coming to visit. Check back for those pictures.